I recently watched a drama where the male lead, after an accident that left him with injuries that could change his life forever, chose to push the female lead away.
He didn’t want to become her burden.
He didn’t want her to suffer.
Many of us would probably do the same.
Placed in the same scenario, we may insist on being independent. Because somewhere within us lives this quiet conviction:
“I do not want to become a burden, especially to the people I love.”
Loving someone often comes with the instinct to be their shield—to appear unshakable so they feel safe. And when we feel like we can no longer be that shield, we retreat.
But an intrusive question crossed my mind—one I almost didn’t want to entertain:
Is it really all for their sake? Purely noble?
Because we don’t want them to suffer?
Because we don’t want to hold them back?
Because we can no longer protect them?
Or is there something else — something deeper, perhaps even subconscious, that we struggle to admit?
Maybe an unspoken fear—
That their love will turn into resentment.
That we will feel useless.
That we will be abandoned.
That we will be seen as less than.
So we choose strength — or at least, what looks like it.
But perhaps it is not strength at all.
Perhaps it is the absence of a different kind of courage—
the courage to be vulnerable.
Because the truth is, we are not invincible. We all have our moments where we break.
And allowing our loved ones to witness those moments—letting them hold us when we can no longer stand alone—that takes a different kind of strength… one we may be too afraid to even recognize.